The Helper

As I have stated, every expat I have met has a helper.  Most appear to be Chinese or Filipino.  Apparently Filipino is preferred, although I'm not sure why.  I have gone back and forth on whether or not we will hire a helper.  After booking a kennel for the dogs for a week in October, I think that we probably will because it will be much easier and cheaper to care for the dogs while we are gone.  Especially when we go back to the States for 5-6 weeks in the summer.  I'm still struggling with this for many reasons.

The helper's room

 


The helper's room is incredibly small.  You have to go to a special store to get a bed that will fit.  The bathroom is even smaller.  I didn't get a picture of the toilet, but it is just to the right of the sink.  The faucet you see above the sink is the shower head.  There is a drain in the floor, so everything gets wet when you use the shower.  We happen to have two helper's rooms in our house.  One is currently being used to hold golf clubs and one of the dog crates with a small dog bed in front of the crate.  When I'm not home this is where I keep the dogs.  I leave the crate door open so that one can lay in there and the other can lay on the bed in front of it.  It is packed full.  This gives you an idea of how small the room is.  I struggle thinking that anyone should live in something so small when we have what we have.  If we had an extra bedroom in the main part of the house I would gladly use that.  Dave keeps reminding me that for many of these women these conditions are better than what they are coming from.

The helpers clean, cook, shop, take care of the kids, walk the dogs, etc.  You name it, they do it.  I have seen women walking through Stanley with a helper pushing their child in the stroller.  I have seen them standing behind a full cart at the grocery store while the helper empties it herself.  I'm not sure I will ever get used to this.  Grace witnessed a friend who lives walking distance from the school call her helper to come and carry her backpack home because it was too hot.  Meg witnessed a girl yell at hers because she came to walk her home from school as the mother requested and the girl felt she was too old for this.

My kids joke that if we get a helper she'll have the easiest job around because I keep telling them they would still have to take care of their own stuff.  Don't get me wrong, it would be wonderful to have someone to cook and clean.  But I could never sit still and let someone do that all for me.  I will have to come to terms with it.  While I am gone this week to get Kaylin settled I had to hire a dog walker to come once during the day while Dave is at work and the kids are at school.  They can't make it from 6:30-4:00.  Then when Dave has to leave on Sunday I had to hire a "Rent-A-Mum" to come stay with the kids.  Unlike in the States, I can't just ask a neighbor to help out with this, they don't even do it in their own homes.  Like I said earlier, the helper makes since from an expense perspective.

That brings up another thing about the helper that is difficult for me to accept.  What you can pay a helper is regulated by Hong Kong law.  The maximum per month is $6000hk, which is about $800us.  They only get one day off a week.  I'm told that even if you were to tell them they can go out, all of their friends (the other helpers) can't, so they won't.

I would love to hear everyone's thoughts on this.